Saturday, December 31, 2011

happy New Year!

You know what people like me love about New years parties? Property damage. So go ahead whoop it up and then call me or someone like me to fix everything that was broken in the partying. Holes in the wall? great. Busted fence? perfect. Did you throw a drunk out that came back and kicked the door in? Awesome! Did the police kick the door in? Even better. Did you catch the kitchen on fire trying to deep fry a michelob?You are my kind of people. I can fix all that without your insurance company finding out and probably for less than your deductible. You can too if you'll just ask me for a little advice. If I don't have the answers I know who does and will help you work towards a satisfactory outcome. ask me I know. Happy New year and stay safe.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Awww Not now.

The garbage disposal quit and the prognosis for the water heater isn't good. Watteryagunnado? The disposal is easy and the water heater doesn't have to be hard. Now is a good time to point out that it is NOT a hot water heater it is a cold water heater. Think about it. If the disposal calls it quits then it is a glass half full situation. Yes you need to fix it but half the job is done by virtue of already having one in the first place. Just go to your local plumbing supply store (until I get advertising dollars I'm not going to recommend one mega-box over another) and purchase a unit compatible with the one already there and follow the instructions for installation using the parts already in place. While you are down there make note of any other minor tweaks you can do to be more productive. See? That was easy.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Tis the season.

For a time of the year when everyone is supposed to be filled with wonder and joy people have incredibly short fuses due to the stress. It matters not what holiday you celebrate or if you even celebrate one. If your particular faith does not have a signifcant holiday this time of year then you are still stressed by the throngs clamoring for the next cool toy or aggressive people dying to get primo parking spots at the mall when a short walk would give them time to de-stress themselves. If you can avoid Wal-hell do it! Better yet tell all the kids that they moved the holiday back because of the economy. Hey it works for the president so it could work for you if you just blame it on the last Santa Claus. Then you sneak in at midnite after everyone exchanges their Chinese crap for the cash they really wanted in the first place.